And so we meet
Three years ago I had no idea how much my life was about to change – how much better and yet more challenging, how much more exciting and yet more mundane my reality would become. I also had no concept of how it was going to change me. And then I had this little guy, my beautiful funny little boy. Once he was here I was exhilarated and shell-shocked by the fact that not only had I created another human being, but now I was responsible for this human being’s development, education, happiness and care.
I loved everything about him, how perfect he was, his tiny little nose and cheeks, his minute fingers and toes. We began his learning curve together and revelled equally in each newly mastered skill. He made me so proud.
And then I realised that I wanted to be not only the best parent I have within me to be, but the best human being. I wanted to teach him to be inquisitive about life and to follow his curiosity, to love knowledge and learning, to laugh as much as he can, to be critical of his surroundings and not just follow blindly because somebody said so; and most importantly that he can be and achieve anything he sets his heart to, as long as he invests himself into it.
To the journey
3 years later much is still the same, but much has also changed. I still have days where I look at him and he is my little boy, but on the whole he now seems so big and independent to me. We have finally conquered the terrible twos and I am able to reason with him on most occasions. He understands a lot and is developing into a smart, well-natured, good-hearted person, somebody I like spending my time with rather than just somebody I’m responsible for. I can see how his interesting mind, although still rudimentary, works and how he reasons. He makes me laugh so much my stomach aches with the funny things he says and does. I like his budding sense of humour and treasure every kiss and hug I can steal from him. I let him try most things for himself, so that he can decide what he likes and what he doesn’t, rather than prescribing what is ‘good’ for him. I think failure is as an important lesson as success. I love his ambition and I encourage him to share even though he doesn’t like it. We read a lot of books, sing a lot of songs and go adventuring as much as my energy will let us. I am very proud of him.
Now don’t get me wrong, although I love him more than I ever thought possible, he is not the centre of my world. I relish the limited time I get to myself and I also love my work as a Kent family photographer and wedding photographer. It inspires me and lets me be an adult. It channels my creativity and let’s me be part of my couples’ happiest day. It also resets my patience, when he’s going through a particularly difficult phase, which in turn then lets me be the parent I would like to be.
It also teaches him that independence is important and a very good thing. I hope I can be an example to him that he will not only look up to as a child, but will hopefully like as a person when he is himself an adult and sees me from an equal viewpoint.
Up, up and away
Now with his third birthday behind us and only a few short months before I have to register him to start school next year, I know that there are many more challenges ahead of us, but there is nothing in this world that I would rather do. I can’t wait to share the rest of his journey into adulthood with him, the laughs, tears and tantrums, and to see where it all takes him, my wonderful, beautiful, lovely little big boy.
Please share some of my favourite moments of our first three years together.